Next time you make a run for the border don’t forget to bring along all the old decrepit cell phones from your junk drawer. As our rock-n-roll programmer Shawn demonstrates, recycling your old phones is easier than ordering two bean burritos.

Taco Bell’s new marketing slogan is “The only thing greener than our guacamole is our phone recycling bin.” Although catchy, I think “The only thing greener than our guacamole is any other restaurants guacamole” would be more accurate.

All joking aside, it’s nice to see big companies making an effort to help out the Earth, which has given so much to them.

Move over Betty Crocker, there’s a new Sara Lee in town.

Today, ArcStonian Pamela Schott brought in a batch of what she calls Oh! Henry bars. They should be called Be-Still-My-Beating-Heart bars because I’m in love.

I want to be locked in a prison made out of Pam’s Oh! Henry bars so I can eat my way to freedom.

I want to collect them like baseball cards, only to eat my whole collection and start all over again.

I want a device hooked up to my desk that rewards me with a bar every time I click my mouse.

I want Steve Nash to practice his free throws with them, shooting at my mouth.

I want to travel back in time so I have more time to eat them.

I don’t want to write anymore because it means I’m not eating.

Everything evolves, even Thanksgiving. This year a host of high-tech achievements are enhancing the experience of gorging on food and avoiding weird relatives.

Turducken – a chicken stuffed in a duck stuffed in a turkey. Truly the pinnacle of bird-based meat dishes.

Turkey Deep Fryer – make your own deep fried turkey with this all-in-one system. Be careful though, heating a huge vat of flammable liquid to high temperatures can be dangerous.

Smoked Beer Can Turkey – this stroke of genius combines turkey, beer, and several scientific principles to infuse your meal with beer flavor.